««« Save the Tree Octopus! | William Brown I »»»

24

September
2003

8:38 PM

And the Winner Is…

I had intended to get out my virtual slingshot and take potshots at anyone whose collar buttoned rearwards and for whom self-flagellation is not in the least bit kinky, even when chanting, or perhaps especially when chanting, but the mail came today and I've had to rearrange my priorities:

NOTICE TO APPEAR - TO WRITE A CITIZENSHIP TEST

27 OCT 2003   11:00am

(stuff)

You will have to write a test about your knowledge of Canada and of the responsibilities and privileges of citizenship. You may write the test in English or French. To prepare for the test, you should study the book "A Look at Canada". At the same time, you will also be expected to demonstrate a knowledge of English or French.

Well, guess I better mark my calendar. And study. I canvassed the folks at Bin 941 tonight, where we were celebrating my having passed all the hurdles that led to getting this letter, and received, out of four respondents, four different answers to the question, "What's the capital of Alberta?"

Obviously, native Canadians will be no help at all. I'm hoping a foreigner wrote the study booklet, or at least proofread it.

comment [3]

--
John — 25 September, 05:43 AM
Vancouverites have a reputation for not being able to see beyond the mountains in their backyard (understandable, I suppose).

I should have been at Bin 941 (tapas place on Davie?) last night. I rock these tests.

West to East:
Victoria
Edmonton
Regina
Winnipeg
Toronto
Quebec
Fredericton
Halifax
Charlottetown
St. John's

Territories:
Whitehorse
Yellowknife
Iqaluit

Email me if you get stuck on the Canada's only officially bilingual province question (hint: it's not Quebec).
pericat — 25 September, 07:55 AM
Ha! I see you have cleverly not listed the actual provinces, forcing me to Do My Own Work. Schoolmarm.

No worries, the book has a map, colour-coded and everything. Damn, Quebec is just huge, ain't it? No wonder I get confused, this thing says that Quebec and Ontario together make up "central Canada". Central, my ass. Must be a Canadian Shield thing.
John — 25 September, 09:00 AM
Yeah, Quebec is huge but most of it is uninhabitable. I don't get the Central Canada thing. Manitoba is "central" Canada. But I think but I think by Central Canada they meant, "place where stuff happens."

commenting closed for this article

--